New Social Media Platform Promises to Enhance Your Ego with AI-Generated Compliments

In a groundbreaking move that experts say will revolutionize social media and personal relationships (and egos), a new platform dubbed ‘Complimentify’ has emerged, offering users AI-generated compliments 24/7. The platform, created by a group of tech-savvy self-esteem enthusiasts, promises to sprinkle a little digital sunshine into the bleak void of internet interactions.

“We just wanted people to feel good about themselves without the pesky requirement of human interaction,” said co-founder and Chief Ego Officer, Bob B. Smooth. According to Smooth, Complimentify employs a state-of-the-art algorithm that can generate feel-good phrases like ‘Your hair shines brighter than my future’ or ‘I’d follow you even if you posted about your breakfast daily.’

Users are encouraged to personalize their compliment streams by uploading selfies, food pictures, and their daily horoscope. One early adopter, Tiffany T., remarked, “Getting compliments from strangers is great, but nothing beats an AI that tells me I could win ‘most fashionable avocado toast eater’ every morning!”

Critics argue that this new platform might lead to the creation of ‘compliment addicts,’ unable to face the harsh realities of unsolicited opinions in the wilds of Twitter and Reddit. In response, Complimentify plans to introduce a ‘Reality Check’ feature that gently taps users on the shoulder with statements like ‘Your mom thinks you should call more often.’

Despite the controversy, Complimentify’s user base has skyrocketed, with millions flocking to the app in search of their daily dose of artificial affirmation. The developers promise even more features in the future, including ‘Customized Insults for Frenemies’ and ‘Sarcastic Remarks for Self-Improvement.’

At publishing time, Complimentify’s servers were reportedly overwhelmed with new users uploading their latest selfies, prompting the developers to install emergency ‘Break-in-Case-of-Self-Doubt’ buttons.