Man Wakes Up After 12-Hour Night Of Sleeping To Discover 12-Hour Day Of Working Waiting For Him

MINNEAPOLIS, MN — A man woke up after a 12-hour night of sleeping to discover a 12-hour day of working waiting for him, the dreaded parallel event to his nightly slumber having occurred without his immediate participation.

According to reports, the man, still bleary-eyed and yawning after his extensive night of sleeping, quickly realized that his waking hours had not coincided with the daily routine of napping, but rather had synced up with the twelve hours of soul-crushing labor at his job.

"No! Not working!" the man reportedly exclaimed as he got out of bed and put on his work clothes. "Why does it have to be working? What about all the other things like eating or daydreaming or having sex? Why does it have to be working?"

Sources close to the man confirmed his despair, noting that he had experienced a thoroughly delightful night of sleeping, free from the responsibilities of being awake and all the various stresses that come with being a sentient human being. His day of working, however, would involve returning to the office and dealing with all manner of tedious tasks, including an excruciatingly long meeting about a project that was already complete.

As the man was preparing to leave for work, his wife asked if he would be home after his shift to help her with the twelve-hour day of living which, as it turns out, also included taking care of the kids. "Why, oh why, didn't I die in my sleep?" the man allegedly lamented.

At publishing time, the man had expressed his profound gratitude for getting to sleep but had quickly regretted being awake.