"When There’s Big Events, People Just Want To Watch Spikeball," Says Creator Of Spikeball Highlighting App With 3 Total Downloads

CHICAGO, IL — As wildfires blazed through the big island of Hawaii, local San Diego resident Ray Lebowski was deep into his summer plans, opening up the app Instaball to watch some hot new spikeball highlights.

The genius behind Instaball, an app solely dedicated to compiling the sport's most riveting highlights, insists he’s practically saving lives—by offering a refreshing distraction in times of crisis.

"When big events happen—wildfires, tornadoes, concerts, mass shootings; you name it—people just want to watch spikeball!" said Avery Shipley, the visionary creator of Instaball, at last week's Chicago Association of Startups and Entrepreneurs annual convention. He elaborated on the pressing need for innovation in crowded app markets, stating it’s all about leveraging niche sports to attract attention.

Despite the app’s noble vision, according to Google Play, Instaball has only been downloaded three times since its launch last month. During a lively roundtable discussion, Shipley hilariously offered free copies of his app to everyone who asked a question. “Even if you’re just here for the snacks, take a download,” he joked.

As he kicked off his talk, he explained, "As a B to C app development founder, I aim to capitalize on the viral nature of some breakthrough discovery by packaging that same product in a snazzy new wrapper. That’s essentially what Uber did with cabs, right?"

Kim Yoo Schooner, a self-proclaimed blitzing tech marketing innovator, chimed in, expressing how the recent attacks on Israel created yet another opportunity for her to promote her own concept of free Spikeball time with her app download.

"Proximity alerts with Instaball allow me to avoid situations of mass confusion," Schooner claimed, pitching her newest project, which notifies users if there are conflicts erupting nearby. Unsurprisingly, her app, Chaosturf, has skyrocketed with over 150 million downloads.

At publishing time, Mr. Shipley announced that he had just awarded downloads number 5 and 6 to two of his bewildered nephews—hoping to spark interest in the elusive world of competitive spikeball.