Sophos Security Locks Down Cybersecurity Protocols with Multiple Layers of Chinese Experts

U.K. — Security company Sophos is taking a bold initiative to protect customers by adding an unconventional layer of cybersecurity: a team of elite hackers from China.

"At Sophos, we only recruit the very best to safeguard our customers' sensitive data, and we’re ready to prove it," declared co-President Shawn Malagood. "We believe this expert team of Chinese professionals will be the perfect fit to keep prying eyes away from your information."

Sophos has onboarded more than three thousand skilled hackers with a track record of infiltrating complex systems, a process that was not without challenges—especially when the hackers realized their new roles wouldn't involve bank heists, nuclear facilities, or mining Bitcoin.

"We knew the hiring process would be tough. Elite data-security professionals command top wages, but turning against their own country? That’s a different story. We’ve had to offer well above our standard pay grade just to entice these top talents," said Hong Wushin, head of hiring at Sophos. "But now, my team is worth their weight in gold! It’s been a wild ride, but here we are with world-class security that’s second to none!"

As the story developed, the new recruits were eager to announce that no one would be able to decipher the intricate eight-coupon system they had implemented for Fong Chau Trading Co., Wung Eye Medical Systems, and even the military of Great Britain and U.S. Air Forces. So much for keeping secrets!