Path Of Super Typhoon Yagi Diverted After Islanders Offer Up Twenty Virgins

HAINAN, CHINA — Super Typhoon Yagi, barreling toward the Chinese island of Hainan this week, made a sudden turn into the open ocean after islanders offered up twenty virgins, sources confirmed.

According to sources, the tropical storm began to change course soon after the virgins were flung into the sea.

"It was incredible," said one islander. "If you count the time it took to gather up the virgins and then find something heavy to tie to their ankles, it couldn't have been more than an hour and a half before Yagi turned. Honestly, none of us thought it would work. What a miraculous day this has turned out to be."

Hainan was expecting Yagi to make landfall within days, bringing the full force of its 150 mph winds. In preparation for the storm, the more than 10 million residents of the island had purchased extra supplies and boarded up their homes and businesses.

"We had done all we could to prepare," said a farmer on the island's east coast. "It's really nice of those virgins to step up like that and make the ultimate sacrifice. Only problem is everyone who stayed behind to see if it would work will probably die anyway, since now our island won't be evacuated until it's too late."

At publishing time, the islanders had agreed to offer another ten virgins to get Yagi turned back around.