Neuralink Brain Implant Finally Lets You Hate Elon Musk In Your Own Mind

BEEBE, ND — Sources at Neuralink confirmed today their new brain implant technology will finally allow those who hate Elon Musk to do so within the confines of their own minds.

Neuralink has been working on their advanced brain implant technology for some time now, allowing users to download their minds into the metaverse or run Candy Crush inside their own heads. However, critics of Elon Musk will finally achieve their dream of being able to hate him in private.

"For so long, I've had to burden the world with my disdain for Elon Musk," said local man Sammy Dwyer. "But with Neuralink technology, I'll finally free myself from my shackles and be free to sulk at home like a normal person."

Critics are understandably excited about the new technology. "I hate Elon Musk," said professor Dr. Andrew Brown. "That's an fact that I think everyone should know. However, thanks to Neuralink, I'll now be able to think terrible thoughts about him without ruining ambience in my favorite coffee shops."

At publishing time, Dwyer had received the implant and was searching for a way to remove it after discovers he was unable to complain about Elon Musk at all.