Nation Gripped By Deep Unease As Kamala Harris Suddenly Appears In Curse Of The Bambino Documentary

AMERICA — The entirety of the nation's populace was puzzled by a deep sense of unease today as Kamala Harris made a sudden appearance in an ESPN documentary about "The Curse of the Bambino."

Slightly shaken by the Vice President's participation in the film, entitled The Grandest Stage: The 2004 World Series, viewers did their best to keep watching. "It's odd — it's almost as if Kamala has no natural part in this subject," said one viewer, though no one could quite place where this feeling was coming from. "I keep thinking, ‘What does Kamala Harris have to do with baseball? Why would anyone ask her to be on a show about that topic?' It's very unsettling."

Despite being somewhat perturbed at Harris's presence, people watching the documentary did begin to find an odd sense of comfort in the realization that the Vice President had been scripted and edited into the film by ESPN producers and was not taking part in her official capacity as Vice President of the United States. "It's very reassuring to know that she was purposefully placed here by the director and producers," said patriarch and Boston Red Sox fan Walter Fenway. "There's something about Kamala Harris being involved in anything "naturally occurring" that is extremely off-putting. I don't quite know what it is."

The documentary features other individuals who have no real association with baseball or its world history, such as Barack Obama and some lady who says she was a spy or something.

At publishing time, survey results had put viewer's minds at ease by indicating ESPN's decision to include Vice President Harris in the film had nothing to do with her Beltway Brat persona.