Many Struggling To Believe Google Assistant Over Apple

SAN DIEGO, CA — According to frustrated concertgoers, during the past half hour of waiting for the band to take the stage, Google Assistant appears to be spreading vicious lies by predicting that the event would start 30-45 minutes late.

"No way, that's kaput! Apple Maps says the concert is right in front of me," exclaimed local music fan Angela Termin. "I’m going to keep standing here in rapt anticipation. Different people like different things!"

"Yeah, okay, Luddite, tell your little story walking," retorted Mr. Termin's mother, Cheryl. "I've read more TechCrunch forums than you could possibly imagine, and everyone there says that Apple is superior in every way. Plus, Maps is baked right into the operating system, so that pretty much seals it, jack! Let's await this concert in peace."

Despite ongoing updates about the supposed delays, the Google Assistant app was quickly banned from one of Mr. Termin's friends. "I did my own research, and no droidbot is gonna gaslight me into believing that the world’s most expensive software system is wrong. Such idiocy!" Cheryl declared, feigning confidence before checking her iPhone 14 once again.

At publishing time, the concert began 45 minutes late, proving Google Assistant’s predictions would be the true ringleader of this circus.