Google Makes World Safer With Gmail Interface Change to Prevent Wingding Encryption Threats

MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA — In a bold move to protect its users from vaguely threatened dangers posed by confusing icons and squiggly lines, Google Inc. has revamped its Gmail interface, effectively outlawing any form of communication that might accidentally include the nefarious Wingding encryption.

"We can't stand idly by while certain malicious groups try to express full statements through nothing but chaotic symbols," said Gmail spokesperson Elizabeth Pushkov in a statement poking fun at this ridiculous scenario. "I’m proud to announce that we’ve taken a stand against this disturbing trend."

Insiders allege that Wingding encryption has been exploited by various hate groups to covertly communicate through emails, doctored screenshots of newspaper articles, and even polite invitations for horse owners to gather for brunch.

"Just think about it — if you managed to crack this bizarre code, you could schedule a horseback yoga class while leaving fans of traditional yoga blissfully unaware," Pushkov elaborated, as she awkwardly tried to relate to users with a benign example. "This puzzling method of writing could lead to unimaginable levels of misunderstanding and conflict," she added.

At press time, Google’s SuperGmail had announced potential improvements to the auto-correct functionality to shield users from unintentional miscommunications stemming from past exchanges with their more... eccentric co-workers.