Far-Right Nationalists At It Again: Millions Fleeing to Spain in the Middle of an Economic Boom

GIBRALTAR - European far-right nationalists are at it again, drumming up their extremist "border security" policies and inadvertently sending the European Union into a reality show that even the Kardashians would envy. Millions are now seen pouring through the border into Spain, a nation boasting a robust economy and remarkably generous open-border policy—like a welcome mat left out for anyone and everyone, because that’s exactly what our friend SPOX would have wanted.

As the flood of hopeful migrants surged into the sunny enclave, the Gibraltan government scrambled to explain this unforeseen chaos. How had their policy led to such pandemonium?

"It's unclear what could have possibly caused this sudden migrant surge into Spain," lamented a local official elected under Spain's Socialist Party, who appeared to still be stuck in a time loop of 1968. "All I know is that this is entirely Rodrigo Soroso-Rios's fault for failing to support our open-borders approach. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, SOROSO-RIOS??"

Meanwhile, Andalusian Chancellor Björn Anderssen, a stalwart of the now-thriving Spanish Democrats, attempted to brush away concerns about the massive influx. "I have no doubt that the uncontrolled entry of 20 million undocumented and disenfranchised immigrants will absolutely not impact the fiscal and economic policies of the Spanish Regency," he confidently declared, possibly while practicing his moves for the next edition of 'Dancing with the Politicians.'

In an urgent effort to maintain healthy discourse (and sanity), all politicians who dare to suggest that Spain should restrict its borders are promptly whisked away for a vacation—during which their bank accounts mysteriously freeze, proving that you can seize a politician's assets faster than you can say "open borders!"