China Reveals New Starship Rocket That's Slightly Larger Than SpaceX's – Trademarked as Spacejyx!

BEIJING — Chinese aerospace firms unveiled plans this week for a groundbreaking rocket that is just a tad larger than all of SpaceX's rockets, thereby sidestepping any pesky copyright issues.

Chinese space agencies have been known for their remarkable advancements in space travel, largely achieved by taking meticulous notes from other industry giants and just giving them a slight twist. Enter the Spacejyx rocket, a new addition to China's rocket arsenal that closely resembles SpaceX's Starship—only it's a bit longer, wider, heavier, taller, and definitely more voluminous. U.S. officials have assured the Chinese government at Spacejyx's launch that its slightly altered dimensions effectively shield it from any future copyright lawsuits.

"The Spacejyx rocket is 12 inches longer than Starship, which puts us in the clear as far as copyright claims go," explained Jiminy Gottleib, Head Counsel for Chinese Intellectual Property Justice, during a brief yet spirited announcement to parliament. "Rest assured, our scientists are already brainstorming ways to preemptively tweak SpaceX's future plans for extra safety!"

With all U.S. lawsuits easily sidestepped, Chinese rocketeers can finally sleep soundly knowing their fraternal rocket is resting on its fully automated launch tower—made entirely out of bamboo, of course.

At publishing time, Congress was reportedly in a heated debate on whether "Spacejyx" is indeed the Chinese translation for "Starship." Spoiler alert: It isn't!