AWS Looks On Nervously As Microsoft Unveils 365 Dropbox Teams Excel Zoom Storage Service

REDMOND, WA — Employees and leadership at Amazon looked on nervously today as Microsoft announced a business software system that combined Microsoft 365, Dropbox, Microsoft Teams, Excel, and Zoom into one package, sources report.

Microsoft's prototype, Business365MegaPro, performed flawlessly in product demonstrations Monday.

"New features in Business365MegaPro include 5GB of cloud storage at just an additional $5,000," said Microsoft spokesperson Jim Wilcox. "Also, meetings will occasionally stop at 39 minutes, but only if 3 or more participants are in a conference room. If you'd like to opt out, Business365MegaPro can be complemented with Business365MegaProPlus."

"And with Business365MegaProPlus, you won't be forced to hear terrible hold music while waiting for your files to upload," he added.

Employees of AWS, who had been watching the demonstration over the internet, were visibly shaken. "This could be the end of Amazon in the cloud storage business," said Senior Director of Technical Product Management Sherry Harlin.

"We're doomed. Absolutely doomed," she said.

Executives from Google, whose product Google Drive was most likely safe, looked on with pity.

At publishing time, Pray.com was offering the broken employees at AWS free lifetime memberships.