AI Programmer Boasts About De-Aging Tom Hanks For A Movie While Secretly Plotting To Create Sentient Military Terminators

BOSTON, MA — Maurilio Mahdis, an AI programmer, recently graced the podcast Invite Only to showcase his groundbreaking work in machine learning that made Tom Hanks look like he just graduated from college. However, he chose to sidestep a far more sinister side project: an AI-driven robot designed to be impervious to modern weaponry, intended to carry nuclear payloads into foreign territories, allowing the U.S. to dodge responsibility for any ensuing global chaos.

"Making Tom Hanks look younger was incredible!" Mahdis gushed. "And let me tell you, crossing the uncanny valley is no walk in the park! I’d love to share more about my other projects, but alas, they remain classified — for now."

According to ARK Technologies, the company behind Mahdis’ work, they’ve developed a total of 36 models, with plans to send one to France to ‘take care’ of Macron and another to Russia for a certain President who’s not exactly a fan of Western ideals.

"I must be like one of you!" Mahdis reportedly declared into a microphone while addressing one of his android creations, instructing it to eliminate his rivals as he plotted his rise through the ranks of technological tyrants — this ambition blossoming just a year after successfully transforming Tom Hanks into a cinematic marvel.

At publishing time, Mahdis was busy training a Frank Langella machine learning model, preparing to replace an AI that had merely starred in films, as he aims for world domination with the smooth charm of a Hollywood icon.