26-Year-Old Imagine Dragons Karaoke Prodigy Can't Find A Girlfriend

AUSTIN, TX – In a shocking turn of events, 26-year-old Damon Kessler, recognized as Austin’s karaoke king thanks to his weekly Imagine Dragons performances, remains tragically single in a city known for its vibrant dating scene.

Local residents are astounded that such a high-profile bachelor has yet to land a girlfriend.

"It's just unbelievable!" exclaimed Tuesday night Karaoke DJ John Xavier. "He gets up on that stage and delivers flawless renditions of ‘Whatever It Takes’ and lights up the room with his charisma. You’d think he’d be drowning in dates! But every night, he waddles home alone. It’s a mystery!"

Eyewitnesses at EGO's Karaoke Club have witnessed Damon’s undeniable talent and magnetic personality, especially when he belts out massive hits like "Radioactive" and "Demons"—songs even non-fans can recognize. However, they also report that the local superstar consistently heads home solo to what many assume is a "Lego Batcave" adorned with a Naruto poster and an unmade bed.

At press time, Damon’s best friend confirmed that he is simply waiting for the right woman—one who not only shares his eclectic interests but also possesses an impressive tolerance for his signature thigh-length baggy cargo shorts.